


End Game

by Chibi_Mochi



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Pining, Post-Time Skip, SakuAtsu, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:27:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27328045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chibi_Mochi/pseuds/Chibi_Mochi
Summary: Atsumu loved Sakusa more than anything in this world. Sadly he isn't Sakusa's end game.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi, Sakusa Kiyoomi/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Comments: 3
Kudos: 38
Collections: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020





	End Game

**Author's Note:**

> Day 1: Prompt (Tier 2): Unrequited Love

Atsumu leaned against the door frame of the room Sakusa was occupying. He was dressed in a beige tuxedo while the other wore an ivory cream one. Atsumu's eyes were glued to the man in front of him, who was smiling happily as they add a few last-minute touches to his suit. Atsumu pushed himself off the doorframe when the tailors moved away and gestured for him to approach Sakusa.

"How do I look?" Sakusa asked. He spun around to show Atsumu his tux, and the latter smiled at him.

"Ethereal," Atsumu answered and walked closer. He fumbled with the brooch in his pocket for a while before taking it out to pin it on Sakusa's lapel. He could feel tears pooling in his eyes, so he took a deep breath to stop it. He shouldn't be crying. He can't ruin Sakusa's day by crying. Atsumu's hand trembled as he pins the royal blue gypsophila brooch that signified endless and unconditional love on Sakusa's lapel. It was his last gift to Sakusa, but he didn't say, the spiker didn't need to know.

Atsumu patted the brooch and took a step away from Sakusa, "there, you look perfect Sakusa," the name felt foreign in Atsumu's tongue, but it's something he needs to get used to. The setter flashed the groom the brightest smile he could muster as he says, "congratulations,"

Sakusa smiled back at him, and Atsumu could feel his heart constricting. "Thanks, Atsumu, it's because of you that I getting married today," hearing his first name roll off Sakusa's tongue made him feel butterflies in his stomach. He could feel warmth surrounding him as he takes in his name. It sounded so beautiful and painful at the same time.

"I'll see you at the altar," Atsumu said and turned his back on Sakusa to hide the tears that quickly welled up in his eyes. He walked to the washroom to recollect himself. He kept on splashing his face with running water to stop the tears that kept flowing like an open faucet. He wasn't supposed to cry on Sakusa's wedding day. He practiced, he cried himself to bed the night before to make sure he runs out of tears, but every time he remembers the time he spent with Sakusa, he couldn't help but feel his heart constrict.

Atsumu took his time to wash away the tears in his eyes and let the redness go away. He was staring at his reflection, and he couldn't help but scoff at how pitiful he looked. He ran his hand through his hair before looking at his watch. He had five minutes to go to the church and stand across Ushijima, the man Sakusa's about to call his husband. Atsumu hated that he feels bitter and jealous instead of feeling happy and excited, but he couldn't just help it. He wanted to be the man Sakusa marries, but sadly that isn't the case. Atsumu gulped and wiped his face with his handkerchief before walking towards the church, praying he looks decent enough.

He arrived, and Komori ran to him, "God, Atsumu, I thought you bailed," Komori joked as he guides Atsumu to where he's supposed to stand. The church was decorated beautifully, and everyone was happily chatting with each other. It was a wedding everyone was looking forward to, except for Atsumu.

"Are you alright?" Komori asked as they walk down the aisle. Of course, Atsumu wasn't okay. But it didn't matter when Sakusa was only a few minutes from marrying Ushijima.

"I'm fine," Atsumu answered in a fake cheery voice accompanied by the fakest smile he could muster. He knows Komori knew what he's feeling right now, and asking him if he was okay was Komori's way of showing that he cares. But Atsumu couldn't just appreciate it, not now.

"Thanks for supporting Sakusa," Komori said and squeezed Atsumu's shoulder before leaving him in front of the altar. Atsumu couldn't help but clench his jaw, he understood that Komori meant well, but it didn't settle well with Atsumu.

_It's just for an hour. You can do it, for Sakusa's sake._

It was Atsumu's only way of making it through the wedding. He was chanting this in his head repeatedly as he looks straight at the man Sakusa's about to marry. Ushijima gave him a slight bow as a sign of his gratitude, and as much as Atsumu wanted to be an asshole, he couldn't find it in him to ignore the man in front of him. So, he bowed his head in return.

A few more minutes passed, and the song started to play. Atsumu's head quickly snapped towards the church doors that slowly opened. First came Sakusa's entourage before Sakusa himself came in. Atsumu couldn't help but admire the man walking down the aisle, Sakusa looked so happy, and even though Atsumu had seen him beforehand, he still found Sakusa breathtaking as he approaches the altar. Atsumu smiled before pressing his lips into a thin line as he recalls the first time Sakusa allowed him to touch his bare skin, the times he walked home with the spiker, the times they lounged in Atsumu's living room and filling the four corners with laughter, the times Sakusa would bandage his overworked wrist and vice versa, the times they spent making fun of each other, the late-night conversations they shared, and the time he realized he loves Sakusa Kiyoomi.

Atsumu asked himself, _when did everything change?_ Was it when Atsumu started looking forward to seeing Sakusa every practice? Was it when he started enjoying every activity and every second he spent with Sakusa? Was it when he started looking forward to Sakusa's late-night messages? Atsumu couldn't tell. He couldn't remember when he started seeing Sakusa as someone more than a friend. He guessed that maybe it was when he started feeling the butterflies in his stomach whenever he saw Sakusa. Maybe it was when he'd willingly stop everything he's doing for him. Or maybe it was when he started feeling giddy whenever Sakusa would call his name. Atsumu couldn't tell, but he was certain that after waking up one morning, he realized that he loves Sakusa Kiyoomi.

Atsumu was ready to confess. He was confident that Sakusa felt the same way because if he didn't, he wouldn't let Atsumu be that close to him. It was a gamble. Atsumu knew what he was going to sacrifice if he confesses, and his intuition was wrong. But Atsumu needed to do it. He needs to tell Sakusa how much he loves him. The feelings he had were overwhelming that he felt like he would combust if he didn't say it. So, Atsumu decided to profess his feelings to Sakusa after their match with Schweiden Adlers. Still, before he could even say anything to him, Sakusa was already running towards him with a smile that reached his eyes. Atsumu has never seen Sakusa that thrilled, so he had to ask.

"Why are you so happy, Omi-kun?" Atsumu asked, thinking that maybe now is the time for him to admit his feelings for him.

"I confessed to Ushijima today, and he said he felt the same!" Sakusa beamed. Atsumu felt his heart shatter, his throat went dry, and his eyes started to sting. But he kept his smile. He needed to.

"That's amazing, Omi-kun," Atsumu said despite feeling the exact opposite. He could feel his chest tighten, and his heart constrict. He should be happy, but how can he when he just got his heart broken before he could even confess.

"I know, and it's all thanks to you," Sakusa whispered. It sounded shy, far from the mean and indifferent way he usually speaks. Atsumu clicked his tongue before showing Sakusa a toothy grin.

"And what could I have done to help you?" Atsumu asked, hoping he didn't sound bitter as he asks.

"You helped me get used to being with other people. Having you touch my skin made me more comfortable with other people doing the same. The times we spent walking home made me realize that it's nice to have company, and I thought maybe I could do it with Ushijima one day. Oh, and the times I went over to your house helped me a lot because the more I went there, I slowly realized that I could be cozy in someone else's home. So, thank you." Sakusa said and bowed. Atsumu felt his lips tremble. He could feel the rage boiling inside of him.

So that's why he spent all those times with me? So that's the reason why his attitude changed from being distant and indifferent to open and kind? It wasn't because he was slowly falling in love with him. It was because he was someone Sakusa used to get over his hatred of mingling with others. He was someone he used to slowly change himself to be able to do things with Ushijima.

"Thank you, Atsumu," Sakusa's words lingered in Atsumu's head, and hearing those words made his blood boil. But when Sakusa raised his head and Atsumu felt all the rage when he saw the happiness in Sakusa's eyes.

"Glad I could help, Omi," Atsumu said before turning his back to leave Sakusa.

Atsumu could never forget the day he found out that the love he was feeling for Sakusa was unrequited. Atsumu took a deep breath as he looks at Sakusa take Ushijima's hand. Tears started prickling Atsumu's eyes as the ceremony starts, and he did well holding them in. But he lets his tears cascade down his cheeks when they started saying their wedding vows. Atsumu watched Sakusa with yearning in his eyes and longing in his chest. He was yearning to feel Sakusa's skin against his for the last time, and he longed to be the person exchanging rings with him. But none of those could happen because he's witnessing it happen to someone else. And he couldn't help but feel bitter knowing that he was the first one to touch Sakusa's skin and the first person to make Sakusa feel comfortable with someone else's presence, but he isn't the end game. He was just the beginning but not the end.

"I now pronounce you, husbands!" The priest cheered. Atsumu wiped his tears and clapped with a fake smile on his face. Sakusa turned to him and grinned widely, mouthing another thank you towards Atsumu.

They started moving towards the reception, and Komori walked to him, "how are you?" Komori asked. There was pity in his eyes as he looks at Atsumu, and he hated it.

Atsumu gave him a weak smile, "fine, I guess,"

"I'm sorry," Komori apologized. Atsumu shook his head. "It's fine,"

Both of them walked in silence after that. They sat at the table assigned to them and listen to the newlywed say their thanks. Atsumu wanted to stand up and walk away from them, but he couldn't. The thanks were done, and both of them started to walk around to talk to the guests. Atsumu stood up and approached Sakusa with a smile on his lips.

"Sakusa, can I speak with you in private?" Atsumu asked. Sakusa turned towards Ushijima to ask for permission, and when the latter nodded, Sakusa trailed behind Atsumu.

Atsumu will be lying if he says seeing their intertwined fingers didn't hurt, and he'd be a fool not to admit that seeing Sakusa kiss Ushijima's cheek didn't make him feel jealous. Atsumu led them to one of the hotel's secluded parts in silence, and when they were together, he turns around with glassy eyes. He could see the evident confusion in Sakusa's face when he faced him with tears in his eyes.

"Congratulations, Sakusa, and thanks for picking me as your best man," Atsumu started. He took a deep breath to gather some courage as he goes with what he decided. "Sakusa Kiyoomi, I love you,"

Sakusa repeatedly blinked after hearing what Sakusa had to say, "what?"

"I love you, Sakusa, not as a friend but as someone I want to spend the rest of my life with. But I know that's not gonna happen now that you're married to Ushijima," Atsumu continued and wiped his tears away.

"Miya," Sakusa said, his voice stern. Atsumu released a sob as his heart constricts. It was getting hard to breath when he heard Sakusa's stern voice. He knew this was going to happen. He expected him to get mad, infuriated even.

"I-" Atsumu started, but his words were choked off by a sob, "I just need to tell you how much I love you before leaving."

Sakusa's eyes went wide, "what the fuck are you talking about?"

Atsumu forced himself to smile despite his trembling lips, "I can't stay in your life Kiyoomi, not while I still have these feelings for you,"

"God, Atsumu, why now?" Sakusa almost yelled. Atsumu could feel the frustration in Sakusa's voice, and he didn't know what to feel.

"Kiyoomi," Atsumu whispered when Sakusa turned around and ran his hands through his hair.

"Fucking hell, Miya! Why now?!" Sakusa asked. Atsumu could hear the fury in Sakusa's voice, and it made him shrink.

"I'm sorry, Omi, I-" Atsumu started to mumble, tears streaming down faster as backs away. "I'm not trying to steal you away from Ushijima. I just needed to tell you. I'll stay away, I promise,"

Sakusa turned to him with bloodshot eyes, and Atsumu didn't know what to do, "You're years late, Atsumu," Sakusa's voice was weak as he said those four words. Atsumu's jaw dropped.

"What?" Atsumu asked, "Kiyoomi, what are you talking about?"

"I loved you before Atsumu, but that doesn't matter now," Sakusa said and raised his hands, "I think you're right when you said you couldn't be in my life anymore,"

Atsumu didn't know what to feel. It was too much to take in, but one thing was certain, there was one thing they agreed on, he can't be in Sakusa's life anymore.

"What?" Atsumu asked. He needed to understand what was happening.

"I learned to love Ushijima when you didn't take the hints I gave you," Sakusa said. Atsumu laughed bitterly, so he was right when he thought that maybe Sakusa loved him as well.

"Sakusa, what the fuck?!" Atsumu yelled, "I was about to confess to you the day we won against Schweiden," Atsumu admitted.

Sakusa gave Atsumu a bitter smile, "I was already in love with Ushijima by then,"

Atsumu wiped his eyes, "Your love must be fleeting for you to just fall in love with Ushijima quickly," Atsumu wasn't sorry for the bitter tone.

"I loved you when we were in High School. I loved seeing you during Nationals. I joined MSBY to be closer to you," Sakusa admitted. Atsumu's jaw dropped.

"Why didn't you just confess then?" Atsumu asked. Sakusa clenched his jaw and fisted his hands.

"How can I when you drunkenly admitted that you love Hinata," Sakusa countered. Atsumu's breathing hitched. He ran his hand through his hair.

"I guess we weren't meant to be together, Miya," Sakusa said and turned his back on Atsumu. "I'll see you around when you're actually over me,"

"If Ushijima doesn't treat you right, then come to me," Atsumu offered before turning his back on Sakusa to leave.


End file.
